Saturday, July 5, 2008

A Blog Post From 1993

(Of course I wasn't actually blogging in 1993. Al Gore hadn't invented it yet. I'm pretty sure I didn't even own a computer. One day all my gazillion grandchildren will sit around my crowded feet and I will regale them with stories from the "old days" when I worked as a teller in a bank with a computer that took up an entire room. And yes, Kanani, I know my modifier may be dangling in that last sentence. I like them to dangle. It kind of turns me on - in a Presbyterian kind of way, which is approved by Heaven.)

I do have birthday pics to post, but I felt bad taking some of the spotlight off America, what with her having a birthday just yesterday and all. I never mind getting special attention, but it just felt unpatriotic to try and compete with a whole country.

So for the next two posts, I thought I'd take a slight detour from my usual light-hearted fare and type up something I came across this week while decluttering my school room (which we call the library, but it sounds a little too snooty when I see it in print.) I was telling my HOH that I needed a new file cabinet, when it hit me. I don't need a new file cabinet. I need less files.

In God's providence I came across an old journal (misfiled...another reason for file purging), then later an article I'd written for a now-defunct magazine. While I don't think my article and the subsequent demise of the periodical were related, the journal and my magazine article are.

Here's an excerpt from the article - It's a little long (how unusual for me!!), but you need the context to appreciate the post from my journal.

"What a privilege and a delight to be the mother of a daughter! And what an awesome responsibility to be charged with the task of modelling before that daughter the characteristics of a virtuous woman (Pro. 31:10). Whether we are aware of it or not, does not change the fact that we are apprenticing our daughters daily for the position of wife/mother/homemaker. We can either do it by default or we can pursue it with a vision and a plan."

"My oldest daughter, Brite, is 15 and she and I had mentally mapped out the direction I would take for this article on mothering teen daughters. Evidently, God had a different plan - and He changed our direction as the events of the last few days have unfolded. At the time of this writing I am 14 weeks into my eighth pregnancy - - - and bleeding. My midwife has suggested complete bedrest and started me on a regimen of various herbs and teas with weird names. Of course, this article deadline took a backseat to higher priorities. In bed for my third full day, the Lord proceeded to outline a new article for me. What a loving and involved God we serve, ladies!"

"God allowed me to realize what our family has been experiencing these last few days, as we fight for the life of our pre-born baby, is a perfect example of how moms model our virtues and beliefs before our children 'when you sit by the house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up (Deut. 6:7)'.
What better classroom in which to learn the precious, fragile lessons of life than the home?"

"The moment I began to bleed, my husband and the children gathered for prayer. Before the midwife was notified or the medical books consulted, they turned to the Creator of this tiny Life for help. Prayerfully, with these kind of memories, our children will learn this as a first instinct."

"We were able to continue to use our crisis as a classroom as I involved Brite in the researching of herbs we could use to strengthen my body against the threat of miscarriage. She has learned to be quite knowledgeable in this area and other non-traditional treatments of illness. How I long to have known these types of things as I was just starting my family. I believe my daughter will be much more involved in her own medical care and the care of her family because her training is not just from books, but has been hands on as she walked through her growing up years with an eye to the future."

"There is never a convenient time for a mother to be "put to bed", but today was the used curriculum sale for homeschoolers in our area. Parents arrive at daybreak to get a prime place in line for this annual event. Like most home-educating families, getting reduced prices on books for schooling is a must for the family budget. My sweet daughter was there at 6:15 a.m. with my list of needed curriculum, ready to bargain-hunt in my stead. This was a great opportunity for her to practice some Proverbs 31 skills -and perhaps a shocking dose of reality as she watched formerly mild-mannered moms in jean jumpers race for the same algebra book, with fire in their eyes. She did not do as well as I would have done - - - she has too much mercy in her."

Later this afternoon, Brite sat huddled with our other children and listened and watched as the elders of our church came and prayed for me and our baby and anointed me with oil (James 5:14). She joined in the chorus as we all sang, "Thank you, Jesus" in anticipation of what God would do."

"Now, she watches me for signs of anxiousness or doubts. She listens to me as I talk to concerned friends on the phone. She hears me tell a neighbor what I believe....That we are in a battle, That death is an enemy for believers today. Satan knows the threat of a Godly seed. And ultimately, Brite will be with me when "all things work together for good(Rom 8:28)."

"Could a textbook or an inspirational article teach my daughter the lessons that walking through this challenge has? Is there a more poignant way to show her the necessity of a humble and cleansed heart at a time when you are asking God for a miracle? These truths are valuable and I would not for a moment take credit for initiating the circumstances that surround them."

"By the time you read this, new friend, we will be on the other side of this particular difficult part of our journey. Only God knows the outcome. Lord knows, I don't begin to pretend to understand (1 Cor. 13:12). But I am thankful for any opportunity to be fully reminded of His faithfulness, mercy and grace - and I believe my daughter, as well as my other children, are eternally changed for having walked alongside me (James 1:2-4)."


Follow-up journal post on Monday, Lord willing.

5 comments:

Meg in Tally said...

How can I comment on this?

You inspire me.

You make me cry...who dropped that hat?

Brite said...

Thanks for the reminder of how much I owe you...so much of my own mothering skills were absorbed vs. taught. I'm very grateful (and this was definitely not a good tear-free post for a pregnant woman!). :) I love you!

P.S. I think you need to start writing posts about the other kids...

homeschoolerz said...

Thank you so much for taking the time to post this, and for taking the time to write it years ago when you did. You are inspiring me to read more blogs. And, you are now inspiring me to blog, because these moments pass, sometimes forever to be forgotten. I suppose if blogging had been invented back then, God would have had Abraham, and Moses, and Jeremiah blog, just to inspire us all today! Happy Blogging!

Kelley said...

I love and am challenged where you state in the beginning that we have a choice in mothering our daughters...mothering by default or vigorously pursuing it (I guess that's rather paraphrased). It can be overwhelming sometimes when I think about the kind of mother I want to be yet it's a good reminder that I should pursue equipping Karis in new ways and hopefully (prayerfully) she will be a better, more godly, more equipped mom than I ever could be. Thanks so much for sharing!

Davene said...

I really appreciate this, even though I don't have a daughter. And you've got me on the edge of my seat because, unlike your friends IRL, I don't know the end of the story. Did you have a miscarriage?

It's Monday, you know...time to post your journal entry! :)